I'm really struggling with fear today. Remember how I said I wasn't going to live in fear anymore? That it's the opposite of faith? Well, it is rearing its ugly head big time right now. Some is related to our financial journey, some is related to my own personal health goals, but mostly it's related to the fear of losing the ones I love.
My Dad had another appointment with his cardiologist today. I find that every time he has a doctor appointment, I sit on pins and needles waiting to hear the latest news. I can usually tell by the sound in my Mom's voice when she answers the phone whether the news was good. I guess today's news wasn't necessarily bad. The results from his latest cat scan on his lungs showed there was no change from the one he had done in the hospital on July 9th. That's especially good considering that we were worried about some long-term damage from a particularly strong heart drug he was on. The doctor referred them to a new pulmonologist. The good of that is that hopefully this one is better than the previous one he went to. The not-so-good news is that it means we wait longer for an answer of how to help him. His breathing has improved slightly, but it's still bothersome.
Last night I had a dream that someone close to me had died. It wasn't my Dad, but the raw emotion of the dream stuck with me even after waking up. I hate those kind of dreams! As I go through my day today, I keep trying to filter this fear through the truths of God's Word. I even have been thinking (once again) about what the people in the town of Blessing, North Dakota (Lauraine Snelling's awesome book series) would be doing in moments like this. It all goes back to trusting God to do what He says He will do. Trusting that nothing is a surprise to Him. Trusting that even when the things of this earth crumble and fade away, He is still right here with us. Praise God!
So, I don't like waiting. I don't like the unknown. I don't like the thought of losing the ones I love.
But. (and this is a BIG but)
But God reminds me to make the most of today, and let tomorrow take care of itself.
But God reminds me that He is my Rock and my Fortress and He will hold me up during the rough times.
But God reminds me that today is an amazing gift. Make the most of it. Treasure the ones you love.
But God.
Ahhhh. I can feel His peace surrounding me even as I type. Thank you Lord for allowing me to feel Your presence.
Now it's time to enjoy this amazing day and the wonderful things God has in store for us! Have a great weekend everyone!!
My Dad had another appointment with his cardiologist today. I find that every time he has a doctor appointment, I sit on pins and needles waiting to hear the latest news. I can usually tell by the sound in my Mom's voice when she answers the phone whether the news was good. I guess today's news wasn't necessarily bad. The results from his latest cat scan on his lungs showed there was no change from the one he had done in the hospital on July 9th. That's especially good considering that we were worried about some long-term damage from a particularly strong heart drug he was on. The doctor referred them to a new pulmonologist. The good of that is that hopefully this one is better than the previous one he went to. The not-so-good news is that it means we wait longer for an answer of how to help him. His breathing has improved slightly, but it's still bothersome.
Last night I had a dream that someone close to me had died. It wasn't my Dad, but the raw emotion of the dream stuck with me even after waking up. I hate those kind of dreams! As I go through my day today, I keep trying to filter this fear through the truths of God's Word. I even have been thinking (once again) about what the people in the town of Blessing, North Dakota (Lauraine Snelling's awesome book series) would be doing in moments like this. It all goes back to trusting God to do what He says He will do. Trusting that nothing is a surprise to Him. Trusting that even when the things of this earth crumble and fade away, He is still right here with us. Praise God!
So, I don't like waiting. I don't like the unknown. I don't like the thought of losing the ones I love.
But. (and this is a BIG but)
But God reminds me to make the most of today, and let tomorrow take care of itself.
But God reminds me that He is my Rock and my Fortress and He will hold me up during the rough times.
But God reminds me that today is an amazing gift. Make the most of it. Treasure the ones you love.
But God.
Ahhhh. I can feel His peace surrounding me even as I type. Thank you Lord for allowing me to feel Your presence.
Now it's time to enjoy this amazing day and the wonderful things God has in store for us! Have a great weekend everyone!!
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